To me, being a parent means that the child that you choose to bring into the world is your responsibility. When I had Noah, I made the choice to look after him and raise him the way in which we chose, as parents, along with the support of our family and friends.
When he was first born, everyone was keen to meet him and to help out; but I felt that this was my time to bond with my child; to learn his cries and cues of feeding, to snuggle with him, get to know him and for him to begin to understand who his mother is. He spent most of the first month of his life having skin to skin contact; tucked in, down my top (which caused much humour to my family!)
Inevitably, you do become exhausted, but that's all part of your early journey as a parent. For the first few months of Noah's life, he fed almost hourly and with reflux, he was continually sick and it was a challenge! My husband did as much as he could, but with working full time and long hours, it was mainly my role. Many people offered to have him in order to give me a rest, but I believe that he's my child, my responsibility. He'd have had a challenge feeding without me there to provide milk anyway!
Due to Noah's small size and inability to latch, I was expressing breast milk around every 2-3 hours around the clock (getting up through the night when the boys were happily snoring certainly wasn't fun!) To me, it was essential and something that I've always been passionate about. A baby's 'perfect food', made specifically for their needs, not some processed substance with additives and things that could irritate his little tummy. I'll be doing the same again for baby number 2. Due to his cleft, it's highly unlikely that he'll be able to latch, so another journey of expressing breast milk begins...
Noah has recently turned 2 and in that time, he's had 2 nights away from us. Once for a friend's birthday, where he stayed with my sister when he was about 1 and another occasion, at around 17 months where we attended a close friend's wedding and he stayed with my mum. They've offered to have him multiple times, however I've refused. He's my child; both day and night. I know lots of couples who go away on weekends and holidays away without their child, but he's part of us. Noah's had multiple family holidays abroad and several UK short breaks and I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving him behind.
Don't get me wrong, I think having time as a couple is important; having a date night to grab a bite to eat or to view a film, but I happily return to attend to my child's needs. Perhaps you'd call it attachment parenting or 'traditional', but it just feels right for our family. I love the bond that we have, I'm far from a perfect parent, but I am the parent I choose to be! What's your opinion?
